Sunday, September 23, 2007

Too Much Stuff

Ok, so I've let three more days go by before posting. In my defense, it's been a really crazy weekend. On Friday, we got ready for the community garage sale all day. I was in my kids rooms pulling things out of the closets and out of the cubbies and decluttering (is that a word?) Flylady would be so proud.

On Saturday, we had our garage sale. It was ok, but not great. I still had lots of stuff left, but hopefully it is being picked up this week by one of the area missions. I am now on a mission to get rid of all of the junk. I feel like I should go back through my house again to clean out some more stuff.

I call it junk, but it really isn't. It's actually pretty good stuff. Toys and clothes that are in great condition because my children have so much that they don't wear it out. I have been struggling the past few weeks as I've been cleaning out with being too blessed. When I see seven pairs of shoes in the floor, I am dealing internally with fussing because my children aren't putting their things away and convicted because some children don't have one good pair of shoes to wear. I am very grateful for the blessings we have... but God is working on me about having too much stuff.

I had a dream this week that a family member's house burned down. In my dream, the person was fine, but they lost everything. I remember thinking in my dream, that the person was important but the things weren't. I woke up very disturbed and spent the better part of the rest of the night praying. I am definitely trying to discipline myself to curb my spending habits.

Today's Christian Woman this month had an article on going on a spending fast. The person said she saved $2,000 in 40 days. That amazes and challenges me to see how much I could save. I usually try to justify my spending and defend most of the things I buy as necessary, but as I look around my house, the proof shows otherwise. But, I am daily learning that I just need Jesus and all the rest of this stuff isn't important. He is working on showing me He is all I need. I mean I know in my head and heart that treasures in heaven are what's important and the things on earth won't endure... but putting it into action and practice is an entirely different story. Living what I believe is what I am working on everyday.

Saturday night was an interesting experience. We attended my husband's 20th year High School Reunion in Greenville SC. I guess that shows our age. I wondered to myself if I looked as old as some of the people there then quickly reminded myself that I wasn't...I'm two years younger LOL. But what really struck me is how hard it seemed that life has been on some of those people. They are 20 years out of high school and so lost. It saddened me to see the condition of some of their lives. They have had to deal with alot of stuff. They are still searching for whatever it is they think will fill them up. They just need Jesus too.

We drove back late last night from Greenville and arrived home around 12:30am. At 5am Spencer (who happened to be sleeping in my bed because we know that lack of rest is a seizure trigger) had a seizure. I woke him from his sleep and it stopped. He went back to sleep and 20 minutes later had another seizure. This one also stopped on it's own but we called the doctor since they seemed to want to cluster. We were told to give him some additional medication. We did and he went back to sleep then had another seizure. We gave him more medicine and then just had him stay up. He was fine the rest of the day just a little groggy from all of the meds. So, it was not a great morning. But... I know God is faithful. He will not allow us to be tempted beyond what we can bear and each trial we endure is purifying us to be more like Him. I learn to trust Him more each time we go through this. We were up to 13 weeks seizure free and now we're back to 13 hours. Moment to moment dependence is obviously something I am working on. When I lay down tonight, it will be harder to sleep because I will wonder if another seizure is coming.

Lately I feel like I've been getting crash courses from God. It reminds me of being in college cramming all night for a test. I'm not sure what the test is going to be though. Maybe that's why I've been having dreams about being in class and not being ready for an exam. In my dream, I'm not ready for the exam because I've had too much stuff to do. I hope this isn't a reflection of real life. I'm praying for the Holy Spirit to tutor me so I can get an A on any upcoming test.

Till next time... Amy

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